Grin and Bear It

As we enter the first official week of social distancing, it gives us all a chance to reflect on how the year has been what we are doing and how we want the rest of the year to go.  

I have found this year, I have allowed myself to be caught up on the hamster wheel of life. I don't know if this feeling is down to the newly implemented rules from the government, my impending 30th birthday or my recent break-up. But I have for the first time in my life begun questioning not just some, but all of the things I do and why I do them... However, I don't think I am alone in the train of thought... A lot of my friends, colleagues and family have recently voiced similar concerns about feeling uneasy. 

I am not normally one to get caught up in emotions and I, like many others, find self-reflection difficult. But I was sent a fantastic article by a friend that made me realise that perhaps the thing I was feeling was... grief.

We are constantly told that there are many stages of grief, but not told that there are different types. The one for me - and many many others at this time is likely going to be anticipatory grief. 'Anticipatory grief is that feeling we get about what the future holds when we’re uncertain.' [What is Your Grief] It is the mind going to the future and imagining the worst, or another label would be anxiety. This would make complete sense at this time as there is no endpoint to this virus, it doesn't discriminate who it will affect, and we currently cannot control it, and there is nothing like worrying about your parents.

So what to do about it? I would say I am mentally resilient and I have multiple coping mechanisms for a lot of things (humour being my go-to). But a few things that I've tried to do during this uncertain time is: 

  • Focus on the present, the hear and now and what you can do, accept you are worried about various scenarios. But those terrible things are not happening right now
  • Let go of what you can't control or If you can't accept it, affect it. If you can't affect it, accept it.
  • Focus on being compassionate and doing something for someone else... And remember even your friend who is really good and always happy has bad days too. 

And most importantly make sure you get a sweat on... However you want to do it, just do it #nike!